Review of "Relentless Pursuit"

Does God pursue? Does he chase after human beings without ceasing in the hopes that they will enter a relationship with Him through Christ? Ken Gire thinks so and wrote a book explaining why. In Relentless Pursuit, Ken Gire introduces the reader to the God who pursues them prior to conversion and forever after.

The author combines scriptural passages with personal experiences to reveal a pursuing God. Whether the person is an outsider in society, crowd, potential opportunity, or within themselves, God will make the chase in order to bring the outsider back to Him.

Good Points:

The author did an excellent job of connecting Scripture to his main argument. Throughout the book, he successfully shows the reader the God that pursues. It also reveals that no one is immune from being an outsider. Whether you are at the top or on the bottom, you will feel lonely and left out. Thankfully, we have a God who knows what it means to be lonely because He was lonely and was an outsider on many levels when He walked on earth in Jesus Christ.

Bad Points:

I found the author could have connected the personal segments of the chapters with what he was talking about in the Bible.   In many chapters he would be going strong with his biblical exposition and then switch into his own personal stories without connecting what was said previously in the chapter to his own life story. Many times I often walked away from those portions asking So, what does that particular personal story life have to do with the chapter? Nothing worse then a reader asking So what? after reading a portion of a book.

Overall Score

Overall, I give Relentless Pursue 3.5/5. It is a good book and I think will connect people to an aspect about God they never knew about before; however, the scriptural and personal components to the chapters could have been connected better.

Book has been provided courtesy of Baker Publishing Group and Graf-Martin Communications, Inc.
Available at your favourite bookseller from Bethany House, a division of Baker Publishing Group

Faithful God

Many words come to my mind when I think about God: Love, power, grace, and holiness are some of them. One word that often slips is faithfulness. I think I often forget about that word because it is a trait that I must learn and grow to count on over time as opposed to right away.

Faithfulness can be defined as "trustworthy, loyalty." Throughout Scripture, God's faithfulness is put on display for all to read. God was faithful to the Israelites and the Church, and He was faithful to fulfill OT prophecies regarding the Messiah. No question, God is faithful and in everything and anything throughout Scripture. It's humanity's willigness to trust in that faithfulness that is up for debate- a debate I recently took part in. It was the debate where God and I fought and argued and emerged stronger and more understanding of one another.

Because of my aspergers, I struggle with finding employment almost every summer since I started post secondary school. Over the course of these years I noticed many people around me who couldn't care less about God found summer jobs easily while I struggled. In the past I shrugged it off because I figured if I trusted in God and remained faithful to Him, He would provide me a good job that would help put a dent in my student debt. However, for the majority of the time that wasn't the case. I didn't get jobs when I still had the advantage in May and June and the jobs I did get at the end of the summer were crap. 

Finally, in the middle of this past June I turned to heaven and I gave God a piece of my mind. I looked to heaven and I told God that I didn't understand why so many people who didn't even bother thanking Him for letting them get up in the morning got jobs so easily and always found better employment then me.  Furthermore, I told Him I wish He would stop "blessing me" with all these shitty jobs that appeared in July and August, and actually provide me with something that would actually make a dent.

That's right, I got angry, swore and made demands at the Creator of the universe. Thankfully, God is not like Zeus, and didn't send a lightening bolt to shock me because I dared to question Him. Instead, God took it all, and we went to the Catholic Church near my house. When I need quiet and visual aids to focus on God, Catholic Churches are where you'll find me. At the church, God directed me to Psalm 73. I'll be posting the Psalm in the NIV:

¹ Surely God is good to Israel,
    to those who are pure in heart.

² But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
    I had nearly lost my foothold.
³ For I envied the arrogant
    when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

⁴ They have no struggles;
    their bodies are healthy and strong.^[a]
5 They are free from common human burdens;
    they are not plagued by human ills.
⁶ Therefore pride is their necklace;
    they clothe themselves with violence.
⁷ From their callous hearts comes iniquity^[b];
    their evil imaginations have no limits.
⁸ They scoff, and speak with malice;
    with arrogance they threaten oppression.
⁹ Their mouths lay claim to heaven,
    and their tongues take possession of the earth.
¹⁰ Therefore their people turn to them
    and drink up waters in abundance.^[c]
11 They say, “How would God know?
    Does the Most High know anything?”

¹² This is what the wicked are like—
    always free of care, they go on amassing wealth.

¹³ Surely in vain I have kept my heart pure
    and have washed my hands in innocence.
¹⁴ All day long I have been afflicted,
    and every morning brings new punishments.

¹⁵ If I had spoken out like that,
    I would have betrayed your children.
¹⁶ When I tried to understand all this,
    it troubled me deeply
¹⁷ till I entered the sanctuary of God;
    then I understood their final destiny.

¹⁸ Surely you place them on slippery ground;
    you cast them down to ruin.
¹⁹ How suddenly are they destroyed,
    completely swept away by terrors!
²⁰ They are like a dream when one awakes;
    when you arise, Lord,
    you will despise them as fantasies.

²¹ When my heart was grieved
    and my spirit embittered,
²² I was senseless and ignorant;
    I was a brute beast before you.

²³ Yet I am always with you;
    you hold me by my right hand.
²⁴ You guide me with your counsel,
    and afterward you will take me into glory.
²⁵ Whom have I in heaven but you?
    And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
²⁶ My flesh and my heart may fail,
    but God is the strength of my heart
    and my portion forever.

²⁷ Those who are far from you will perish;
    you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
²⁸ But as for me, it is good to be near God.
    I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge;
    I will tell of all your deeds. 

This Psalm was written by Asaph. I guess he and I noticed the same things, only in different eras of human history: The people who disregard God are the ones getting all the goods, while believers are often dirt poor. From that time at the Church I realized that the only thing I could do was trust in God and believe that He knew what He was doing. In that Catholic Church I told God I don't get it but I will trust in Him and take faith from the cloud of witnesses (see Hebrews 11) that are surrounding me, specifically Asaph.

Unfortunately, I still had no job. One week later, I was still confused and wrestling with all this. Instead of going to the Catholic Church, I believe God directed me to post on my facebook wall this:

I don't understand my life. The Scriptures say, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well" (Matthew 6:33). I seek God first when I wake up and strive to do His fill as my first priority, yet I am still unemployed and I'm always the last of my siblings to find a job during the summer and it usually doesn't deliver. And when I pray that I find a job quickly, I feel as if I'm hitting a brick wall. What am I doing wrong? What is God waiting for?

Well, about a day I found a job add for a produce stand and a couple of days later I got the job! Pays $10.25/hr and I work between 3-5 days a week and get almost 50h.  So, God FINALLY answered the prayers and I got a job that will definitely help my debt load.

What can be said about my experiences? Some people thought I should take back what I said on Facebook. After all, I should be showing off God's faithfulness, not my doubts. I suppose in many ways that's true, but I won't remove what I said on my facebook status. Personally, I think the fact that I could say that without fear of being struck down by God or anything is a sign of God's faithfulness too. In fact, I think that God was waiting for me to be honest with Him and say what I was burying for the past few years before He acted and got me that produce stand job. 

If anyone reading this thinks I'm the first believer to get angry at God and give Him a piece of their mind, they are, with all due respect, very mistaken.  Asaph wasan example. Another example is Jeremiah in Lamentations 3:1-18,

¹I am the man who has seen affliction

    by the rod of the Lord’s wrath.

² He has driven me away and made me walk

    in darkness rather than light;

³ indeed, he has turned his hand against me

    again and again, all day long.

⁴ He has made my skin and my flesh grow old
    and has broken my bones.
⁵ He has besieged me and surrounded me
    with bitterness and hardship.
⁶ He has made me dwell in darkness
    like those long dead.

⁷ He has walled me in so I cannot escape;
    he has weighed me down with chains.
⁸ Even when I call out or cry for help,
    he shuts out my prayer.
⁹ He has barred my way with blocks of stone;
    he has made my paths crooked.

¹⁰ Like a bear lying in wait,
    like a lion in hiding,
¹¹ he dragged me from the path and mangled me
    and left me without help.
¹² He drew his bow
    and made me the target for his arrows.

¹³ He pierced my heart
    with arrows from his quiver.
¹⁴ I became the laughingstock of all my people;
    they mock me in song all day long.
¹⁵ He has filled me with bitter herbs
    and given me gall to drink.

¹⁶ He has broken my teeth with gravel;
    he has trampled me in the dust.
¹⁷ I have been deprived of peace;
    I have forgotten what prosperity is.
¹⁸ So I say, “My splendor is gone
    and all that I had hoped from the Lord.” 

... or what  Heman the Ezrahite had to say in Psalm 88:

¹ Lord, you are the God who saves me;
    day and night I cry out to you.
² May my prayer come before you;
    turn your ear to my cry.

³ I am overwhelmed with troubles
    and my life draws near to death.
⁴ I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
    I am like one without strength.
⁵ I am set apart with the dead,
    like the slain who lie in the grave,
whom you remember no more,
    who are cut off from your care.

⁶ You have put me in the lowest pit,
    in the darkest depths.
⁷ Your wrath lies heavily on me;
    you have overwhelmed me with all your waves.
⁸ You have taken from me my closest friends
    and have made me repulsive to them.
I am confined and cannot escape;
⁹     my eyes are dim with grief.

I call to you, Lord, every day;
    I spread out my hands to you.
¹⁰ Do you show your wonders to the dead?
    Do their spirits rise up and praise you?
¹¹ Is your love declared in the grave,
    your faithfulness in Destruction^[e]?
¹² Are your wonders known in the place of darkness,
    or your righteous deeds in the land of oblivion?

¹³ But I cry to you for help, Lord;
    in the morning my prayer comes before you.
¹⁴ Why, Lord, do you reject me
    and hide your face from me?

¹⁵ From my youth I have suffered and been close to death;
    I have borne your terrors and am in despair.
¹⁶ Your wrath has swept over me;
    your terrors have destroyed me.
¹⁷ All day long they surround me like a flood;
    they have completely engulfed me.
¹⁸ You have taken from me friend and neighbor—
    darkness is my closest friend.

And I thought God and I had problems! 

The point is, God is a faithful God. He is faithful in trials and when times are good. His children should never be afraid to call God on it and seek Him when they have their doubts. When we don't take our anger and frustration and doubts to Him, it just creates a wedge between God and the person because we aren't looking at Him with trust anymore but with doubts and some suspicion.  So, don't be afraid to be brutally honest with God!! He's the all powerful God of the universe; He can handle someone yelling at Him. He can handle YOU yelling at Him. I think what He can't handle in terms of relating to His children is when they hide stuff from Him and hide what their true emotions are. 

This is one lesson that I hope I will remember, as trials will come again. Is God faithful? Yes He is! Will I yell at Him about it again? You bet! And I will keep yelling at Him about it if it means God and I will grow closer together instead of far a part. 


Scripture verses taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Smoking in Bus Shelters

When I was living in Kitchener, I relied on the Grand River Transit (GRT) to get me from point A to point B. The majority of those bus trips were in the winter time. Although Kitchener's winters are milder then other parts of ON, there were still days where I felt the icy wind sting my cheeks and almost solidify my legs to icicles. During those waits I often waited in the bus shelters. During some of the waiting periods, I smelt something odd and unpleasant. When I turned around to look, I saw someone smoking in the bus shelter in spite of the sign across the front of the shelter that says no smoking.

I think those signs in Kitchener are there for decoration. Whether it is a beautiful and warm sunny day, or a rainy and miserable one, I sometimes still saw people sitting in the bus shelter smoking.  I have even read tweets from people on Twitter, such as @crushnaut, catching GRT drivers smoking in non-smoking areas. Not only are these drivers, the ones who are supposed to be obeying the rules, enabling people to break them but are almost rendering the rules null and void. This whole issue of people smoking in areas where it is prohibited is a problem.

Why is it a problem? It's not problem because they are just breaking the rules. It's a problem because those smokers really are being disrespectful of the people around them in many ways. First, they know as well as the rest of us that smoking in an enclosed area is not good for people's health. This is why it is illegal to smoke in a car with a minor in it. By releasing second hand smoke into an enclosed area, a smoker is exposing everyone that's in it to much more second hand smoke then they would if they were smoking outside.

Second, the smokers are making a very big bet that the people in the bus shelter with them will not be bothered by it. I don't mean simply not liking the smell, but I mean people who could severely react to it. For example, one of my friends who has severe couldn't stay in a bus shelter in the winter time when it was really cold in Kitchener and the wind was brutal, because someone was smoking in it. On another day she had to stand outside during a down pour in the fall because again someone was smoking in the bus shelter. By smoking in the shelter, smokers could risk threatening someone's life because they'd much rather smoke inside then outside. What if someone with lung cancer, a severe case of asthma, or worse walks into the shelter?

Third, they are endangering the health of children. As I said above, it is illegal to smoke in a car when a minor is in it. Children in many ways are more prone to severe health problems, like developing asthma, because their lungs and other organs are not fully developed and matured to be able to withstand this sort of thing. Once I saw a person start to smoke in a bus shelter that was also occupied with a woman and her baby while it was raining. What could the woman do? Her baby can't be exposed to the rain, but the bus shelter isn't safe anymore because someone is smoking.

To me, failing to comply is in many ways failing to be a modeled citizen, and is inconsiderate . As for GRT drivers, this is showing poor customer service, because you aren't respecting the well being of your passengers when you smoke in areas that you're workplace deems is inexcusable.

What can be done about this? First, I think smokers in Kitchener need to obey the law. They are not allowed to smoke in bus shelters ever. Second, I think GRT needs to start obeying and enforcing the law. Smokers wouldn't do it if they couldn't get away with it. Third, I think they need to make bus shelters that people can smoke in. I don't think it's fair for smokers to endanger others by smoking in bus shelters but I don't think they need to suffer out in the rain, wind or snow either. Rather, I think that GRT should provide some kind of shelter for them to go and smoke in peace without worrying about the elements or harming the people around them.

If there are smoking and non-smoking bus shelters, then everyone has a place to hide under when the weather isn't doing so well. Though I suppose smoker's could wait until they got home, for example, to smoke, it is still nice to have the option. Those bus shelters are there so that customers don't have to wait and be exposed tot he weather, so there must be a way to have them so they don't exclude anyone. When smokers smoke in shelters, which by law exclude smokers already, it inevitably excludes people who would be severely hurt, if not killed, if they are exposed to second hand smoke. Giving smokers would remove that exclusion.

Example of my Academic Writing

Essay for the Holy Spirit and the Church Final Exam

The Holy Spirit is the third member of the Holy Trinity. The Holy Spirit was sent by the Father and Jesus in order to be with the church and keep it together. The Spirit is God with the individual and God with the New Covenant people. Through the Holy Spirit, some of the New Covenant promises are fulfilled during a believer’s earthly life. Furthermore, the Holy Spirit is God’s seal of salvation on the believer guaranteeing that they will experience the New Covenant fulfilled when Jesus comes back. 

The Holy Spirit works in the pre-Christian heart. The Spirit prepares the person for Jesus and the Father to reside in their heart through the Spirit, and the person to have a relationship with God. This is what happened at Pentecost: through the Spirit, the Father and Jesus could be with their people and take possession of the church despite being in heaven and the people could experience the presence of God as Trinity. Through the Spirit’s ministry people are brought into the New Covenant because He is the one that causes re-birth. During a believer’s lifetime the Holy Spirit sanctifies them and ensures that they grow in Christ. 

The Holy Spirit is who enables a person to have communion with the Triune God because He is the Spirit of God and the Spirit of Christ. The Spirit does this in many ways such as through the reading of the written Word, the Lord’s Supper, and prayer. The Spirit also enables the individual and the church to persevere in the faith. Without Him there would be no Christian faith and no church because the followers of Christ would never have grown beyond themselves or endured the centuries.

The Holy Spirit is the one who drives the mission of the church. The mission of the church, as described in Matthew 28:18-20, is to make disciples and teach those disciples what Jesus taught. Many people answer the call and go across oceans and cultures in order to bring the Gospel to the nations. These missionaries face many hardships, such as rejection, persecution, and culture shock in order to fulfill the church’s mission. For many, the Holy Spirit is the only reason why they entered into the mission field. From calling Paul and Barnabas in Acts 13:2 to sending missionaries to the Middle East, the Holy Spirit drives them forward and continues to call people in the church to go and preach the Word to people who have never heard it before.

Finally, the Spirit helps to connect spiritual realities with contemporary realities. The church can seem like it is anything but what it is supposed to be on a bad day. It can be quarrelsome, arrogant, intolerant and closed minded, hypocritical, and a big waste of time. Further, it seems to do a good job of disobeying the Bible it claims to base its standards on. As it divides into hundreds and hundreds of denominations, it seems that it is destined to fall apart.  Thankfully, the Holy Spirit will keep that from happening.

 The Holy Spirit that brings understanding into what the church truly is. In spite of outwardly sinful behavior, the church is holy because it is a temple of the Holy Spirit.  Despite being divided, Christians are still a part of the people of God, the church of Christ and the fellowship of the Spirit. Only through the Spirit can an individual remain active within the Christian faith and maintain these things in balance and attempt to help the church maintain its image and mandate, despite humanity’s failings. 

The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of God and of Christ. Through Him, God’s people maintain an intimate relationship with God and participate in the New Covenant. The Spirit brings people into communion with Christ and enables them to fulfill the mission He gave His people. Without the Spirit, the church would have closed its doors long ago. Therefore, the Spirit should worshiped  and praise because He is God and He has directly endured two thousand years of blessing and heartache as He guides, teaches, and comforts God’s people toward the consummation of history at return of Jesus Christ, and beyond.

Carivibe 2012 Review

There is no doubt that Canada is a multicultural country and it celebrates its multiculturalism in many ways. In the nation's capital, Ottawa, Carivibe is one of the ways it is celebrated. In its third year running, Carivibe celebrates Ottawa's Caribbean people through various local Caribbean artists, Caribbean food and the selling of many Caribbean souvenirs, such as flags and CDs. When I attended the festival today, I got to breathe in some of my heritage, as my dad is from Dominica.

Positive Aspects of the Festival:
The festival drew in many people who are from the Caribbean Islands from the Dominican Republic/Haiti to Barbados.  It gives the people a chance to mingle and celebrate their culture together. Many non-Caribbean citizens also made the journey towards Petry Island in Orleans, an Ottawa community, to dance to the music and get a taste of Caribbean life. So, the bringing of people from all cultures not only celebrated the Caribbean but showed how Canada is a country that is welcoming to all people.

What was provided at the festival was good. They had many Caribbean artists that knew how to get the audience dancing. They offered Caribbean food that wasn't shy to be a bit a spicy but not too spicy so that many people unfamiliar with it would be turned away. And of course, they also had a station selling traditional Canadian food, like poutine and hot dogs. I think it was good because I'm sure some people there might be used to Caribbean food, and may like to have some Canadian/Western food for a change. Finally, they had booths that sold various jewelry and Caribbean flags.

So, it was an overall a good presentation and celebration of Caribbean culture and its community in Canada's capital. 

Negative Aspects of the Festival:
 The disorganization of the festival was a huge draw back, especially when it came to parking. There was a city bus rented to be a shuttle between the nearest Park and Ride and the festival on Petry Island. There was no big field for everyone to park their cars, in fact there was no place near the area for people to park their cars, and the park and ride was small to say the least.  So for next year, definitely have a better place for people to park their cars, like a big parking lot plus a park and ride, and have more than one shuttle bus.

The second thing is the rules. First, if you left the festival you had to lose your bracelet and then pay to get back in. This is a problem regarding my final problem, there was no place for people to smoke. This is not the fact that I smoke, but some of the people I was there with did and the festival didn't really cater to them. The place was non-smoking, and if someone wanted to smoke they'd have to leave and then pay to get back in. Not to mention the security didn't even bother enforcing that rule. One officer would talk to one guy then completely ignore the others who were smoking in the same area. What's the point in having a rule that you don't enforce?

Conclusion:
Overall, it was a very good festival. It just needs to re-evaluate how it is organized and hire security that will enforce the rules. 

Help Me to Stand- A Poetical Prayer

Father, help me to stand
Remind me that I am firmly in your hand
In spite of this trial
A trial that seems so vile

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death1
I shall come to you for rest
This trial is unavoidable
But You, Lord, are faithful

Even though fog clouds my vision
You are still near
My faith is not in my emotions
My faith is in Your Person

Jesus, you are with me til the end of the age
I want to see your faithfulness today
Help me stand under this trial
Let me grow stronger from something that seems so vile

Spirit, I know You are here
Through trials you draw me near
You draw us me Yourself, the Father and the Son
You remind us that someday my trials will be done

Victory is in Mighty God
He strengthens and improves me through the discipline rod
Even though painful at first
Discipline draws me to God, who quenches my thirst2

Your God is with you
Do not fear the valley of the shadow of death
My God is my rest
I will not be afraid of evil

Only in Christ can I stand
Never will I be torn from His hand
God is my rock and my salvation
Forever I am in His protection

Through Christ I will stand under the trial
Only from the Father my strength will come
Only in the Spirit will I find true comfort for my soul
My faith and my trust is in the God from of old

Through the Mighty God, the solid rock, I will stand

1. Psalm 23:4, "Even though I walk   through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff,  they comfort me" (NIV1984).

2. Hebrews 12:7-11, "Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10 Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it" (NIV1984)

Poem's Description:
So, I've been interacting with people both on and offline and trials and hardships keep coming up. I went through a trial over Christmas and many others are going through trials now. This lead to me being inspired to write this poem about trials today and I'm going to share it with you.

The truth of the matter is trials are inevitable in the world we live in. Everyone, whether young or old, and regardless of nationality, suffers and goes through hardships. To not expect them or assume they won't come after a person comes to Christ is unrealistic and will become a disappointment. While we are powerless in avoiding them, we do have a powerful weapon during them, which is the gift of free choice. We can choose to allow them to crush us or call upon God and trust in His strength to allow us to stand up underneath it.

Personally, I choose to draw upon the Mighty God to help me stand up underneath them. Not only I will be closer and more in tune with Him, but I will be a stronger individual. This poem is an invitation for you to do the same!

Here is where I got the cover art- http://ic2.pbase.com/u11/mansour_mouasher/upload/38044668.292.jpg

And copyright information for the NIV- Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 Biblica. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.
 

Revan's Legacy

Author: me, vadess40
Game: Knights of the Old Republic
Characters: Female Darth Revan
Disclaimer: Originally posted here. Female Darth Revan and KOTOR belong to Bioware and LucasArts

As I gaze upon the valley
And see the tombs of the Sith Lords of old
My heart becomes quite heavy
And sadness takes hold

I look upon the work of my hands
Students digging for treasures
That are hidden deep within these dark lands
Oblivious to their enslavement to the darkness' pleasures

I am Revan
What I see is a results of my plans
Plans that are long forgotten
And must be destroyed and brought to a bitter end

I am a Jedi and I regret my former dark life
If only I had not fallen in deep space
Then these students would not be at this place,
And they wouldn't be lost in this twisted world of deception and strife

I was the Dark Lady Revan
I was once their empress and leader
Now all they see in me is a pathetic seeker
A hopeful, who just wants what Revan lost to her betrayer

I am the Jedi Revan
I will not seek revenge
I will only see justice served
For those on Telos and Taris who died by Darth Revan's word

No, I cannot deny what I once was
But I will not embrace it either!
I will fight it with all my strength
A strength that must not wither!

I am Revan
I was Darth Revan, Dark Lord of the Sith
I was the Sith Empire's Queen
Hopefully my legacy can be redeemed

I am Revan
Now I am reborn
Now I am a Jedi
Hopefully I can be forgiven in the galaxy's eye


Follow up to my Countless Droplets of Power. So in KOTOR Revan can either be redeemed or fall back to the dark side again. For my play through, she chooses the light side and is redeemed. So, this poem takes place between after she learns the truth and the ultimate no turning back choice. Enjoy!